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Proud Member of the Women Film Critics Circle

10 REMAKES TO REMEMBER

by Paulette Reynolds
​November 17, 2016

Remakes – Aren't they just Hollywood’s way of bringing in more bucks to fill their coffers?  Actually, the new treatment of a popular film can spark interest in a genre, forgotten author, star or director. Here are a few of Cine Mata's favorite remakes, with the originals listed first.

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Bedazzled 1967

Starring Peter Cook, Dudley Moore, Eleanor Bron, Raquel Welch

Director: Stanley Donen
Screenplay: Peter Cook and Dudley Moore



The winning team of Cook and Moore, together with a sharp screenplay, holds up even better than the current 2000 remake. Peter Cook and Dudley Moore trade playful verbal gems in this satirical take on the meaning of Life and God, British-style.


Stanley Moon: "Apart from the way He moves, what's God really like? I mean, what colour is He?"

George Spiggott: "He's all colours of the rainbow, many-hued."
Stanley Moon: "But He is English, isn't He?"
George Spiggott: "Oh yes. Very upper class."




Bedazzled 2000

Starring Brendan Fraser, Elizabeth Hurley, Frances O’Connor 

Director: Harold Ramis
Screenplay: Larry Gelbart, Harold Ramis, Peter Tolan



The inspired addition of Elizabeth Hurley as the Devil and the supporting cast of Orlando Jones, Tobey Huss, Bob Adelstein, and Miriam Shor provide fresh laughs in this new offering.


The Devil: [about souls] "It's like your appendix. You'll never even miss it."

Elliot Richards: "Yeah? Well, if it's so useless, then how come you want it so much?"
​

The Devil: "Oh, aren't you a clever one?"


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Cleopatra 1934

Claudette Colbert, Henry Wilcoxon, Warren William, Ian Keith, C. Aubrey Smith, Irving Pichel

Director: Cecil B. DeMille
Screenplay: Bartlett Cormack and Waldemar Young



Cecil B. DeMille’s classic still manages to fascinate modern audiences who consider the Taylor-Burton remake a bit overblown. Claudette Colbert as Cleopatra is wonderful to watch as she uses her wiles and wits in a man’s world of politics and intrigue.  (See Cine's review at The Golden Age, Cleopatra 1934.)


Cleopatra: "Together we could conquer the world."
Julius Caesar: "Nice of you to include me."



Cleopatra 1963

Starring Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, Rex Harrison, Martin Landau, Cesare Danova, Kenneth Haigh, Hume Cronyn, Roddy McDowall

Director: Joseph L. Mankiewicz
Screenplay: Joseph L. Mankiewicz and Ranald MacDougall



This 1963 blockbuster remake took over three years to create, running over budget and over-time, not to mention (but we will anyway) the trauma-drama dredged up over the Taylor-Burton romance. Beautiful to look at, the first half of the movie plays a lot better than the second half, which is living proof that the editing gods were against this Mankiewicz production.

​

Cleopatra: "You come before me as a suppliant."
Antony: "If you choose to regard me as such."
Cleopatra: "You will therefore assume the position of a suppliant before this throne. You will kneel."
Antony: "I will *what*?"
Cleopatra: "On - your - knees!"
Antony: "You dare ask the Proconsul of the Roman Empire?"
Cleopatra: "I *asked* it of Julius Caesar. I *demand* it of you!"


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Rear Window 1954

Starring James Stewart, Grace Kelly, Thelma Ritter, Wendell Corey, Raymond Burr

Director: Alfred Hitchcock
Screenplay: John Michael Hayes


Everything works in this masterpiece, as James Stewart and Grace Kelly let their curiosity get the better of them and a nefarious neighbor, played by a young Raymond Burr. Thelma Ritter’s caustic humor and Hitchcock’s superb directing keeps this original thriller fresh for today’s eyes.


Lisa: "What's he doing? Cleaning house?"
Jeff: "He's washing and scrubbing down the bathroom walls."
Stella: "Must've splattered a lot." [both Jeff and Lisa look at Stella with disgust]
Stella: "Come on, that's what were all thinkin'. He killed her in there, now he has to clean up those stains before he leaves."
Lisa: "Stella... your choice of words!"
Stella: "Nobody ever invented a polite word for a killin' yet."



Disturbia 2007

Starring Shia LaBeouf, Sarah Roemer, Carrie-Anne Moss, David Morse, Aaron Yoo

Director: D.J. Caruso
Screenplay: Christopher B. Landon and Carl Ellsworth



D.J. Caruso’s fresh take and Shia LaBeouf’s troubled teen make for a winning combination in this updated version of Hitchcock’s classic. The only flaw is the screenplay’s unrealistic climax – but hey, if we watched all movies for their realism, Hollywood would be a parking lot!

​

Ronnie: "It reeks in here!"
Kale: "What's it smell like?"
Ronnie: "The corpse of a rotting hottie."


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Death Takes a Holiday 1934

Starring Fredrick March, Evelyn Venable

Director: Mitchell Leisen
Screenplay: Maxwell Anderson and Gladys Lehman


This original film is far superior to the 1998 remake, due to Fredrick March as Death and Evenly Venable as Grazia and a poetic script. The ending serves to highlight that some films really shouldn’t be remade, only re-issued!


Grazia: "Who are you?"
Death: "Sirki."
Grazia: "I don't mean that. You seem to come from a distant place. When I'm with you, I see depths in your eyes that are like the worlds I visit in sleep. And beneath your words is a sound I've heard in dreams. When you leave me, the light goes from the sky. You're like the mystery that's just beyond sight and sound. Always just beyond my reach. Something that draws and... frightens."



Meet Joe Black 1998

Starring Brad Pitt, Anthony Hopkins, Claire Forlani

Director: Martin Brest
Screenplay: Ron Osborn and Jeff Reno



The cast struggles to make sense of a over-cooked turkey of a script and some deadly directing, but then – hey, when you have Brad Pitt in the lead, who cares about such trifles?

​

William Parrish: "It's hard to let go, isn't it?"
Joe Black: "Yes it is, Bill."
William Parrish: "And that's life... what can I tell you."


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Dial M for Murder 1954

Starring Grace Kelly, Ray Milland, Robert Cummings, John Williams, Anthony Dawson

Director: Alfred Hitchcock
Screenplay: Frederick Knott


Cine’s going to shock some, but really, Dial M for Murder simply isn’t one of Hitchcock’s better efforts. Yes – there’s the “scissors” scene, but little else to keep us entertained. It’s hard to relate to the characters and the plot seems to plod along to a rather tired ending. Oh hum.



Margot Mary Wendice: "How long have you known this?"
Chief Insp. Hubbard: "Did you suspect it yourself?"
Margot Mary Wendice: "No, never. And yet... What's the matter with me, Mark? I don't seem able to feel anything."



A Perfect Murder 1998

Starring Gwyneth Paltrow, Michael Douglas, Viggo Mortensen, David Suchet, Sarita Choudhury

Director: Andrew Davis
Screenplay: Patrick Smith Kelly



Ok, this is a clear case of imitation NOT being the highest form of flattery. The actors shuffle woodenly through a treadmill of a movie – but yes, there is the “kitchen” scene!
​

David Shaw: "What happens if the plan goes to hell?"
Steven: "It won't."


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Hairspray 1988

Starring Rickie Lake, Divine, Jerry Stiller, Ruth Brown, Michael St. Gerard, Clayton Prince, Leslie Ann Powers, Colleen Fitzpatrick, Deborah Harry, Sonny Bono, Shawn Tompson

Director: John Waters
Screenplay: John Waters


Indie director John Waters went mainstream with his solid gold hit musical of high hairjinks, teenage love, and integration in Baltimore during the 1960s. Not only did his lead teen not sport a size 2 figure, but her mother was played by his famous muse, tranny star Divine, AND he tackled the subject of interracial love and friendship with humor and a rocking score.

However, Divine’s performance appears somewhat angry and hostile for a mother, as the 2007 Travolta performance underscores this only flaw.



Edna Turnblad: "Look at your hair. All ratted up like a teenage Jezebel."
Penny Pingleton: "But Miss Edna. Tracy's "flamboyant flip" is all the rage. Even Mrs. Kennedy, our First Lady, rats her hair."
Edna Turnblad: "But Tracy's no First Lady is she? No siree. She is a... hairhopper."



Hairspray 2007

Starring Nikki Blonsky, John Travolta, Christopher Walken, Queen Latifah, Zack Efron, Elijah Kelley, Amanda Bynes, Brittany Snow, Michelle Pfeiffer, James Marsden, Allison Janney

Director: Adam Shankman
Screenplay: Leslie Dixon



Every element of this version of Waters vision is a gem – from the cast, music, choreography, script, acting and directing. Nominated for three Golden Globes, Hairspray 2007 proves that imitation not only IS the highest form of flattery, but art as well.


Penny Pingleton: "Oh, no!"
Tracy Turnblad: "What?"
Penny Pingleton: "Your hair deflated!"
Tracy Turnblad: "Let it. It was just a symbol of my conformity to the Man."
Penny Pingleton: "You are so tough."


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The Heiress 1949

Starring Olivia de Havilland, Ralph Richardson, Montgomery Clift, Miriam Hopkins

Director: William Wyler
Screenplay: Augustus Goetz

The Heiress scooped up numerous awards for what is a definitive treatment of Henry James novel, “Washington Square”, a story about a shy heiress caught between two selfish men and her own desires. A must-see film, this is not a “chick-flick” in any sense of the word, but a carefully constructed tale, brilliantly directed by William Wyler.


Aunt Penniman: "How can you be so cruel?"
Catherine Sloper: "Yes, I can be very cruel. I have been taught by masters."



Washington Square 1997

Starring Jennifer Jason Leigh, Albert Finney, Ben Chaplin, Maggie Smith

Director: Agnieszka Holland
Screenplay: Carol Doyle



A modern up-do, Jennifer Jason Leigh and Ben Chaplin bring a fresh look to this re-telling of the Henry James literary classic, more from the central character’s perspective than the ominescent viewpoint of the 1949 original.

​

Morris Townsend: "You would hear me abused without opening your lips in my defense?"
Catherine Sloper: "My father would not abuse you. He does not know you well enough."



Jane Austen’s literary classics are always being remade and retold for the next successive generation. Here are no less than four of Cine’s picks for Pride and Prejudice viewing:

​

Pride & Prejudice 1940

Director: Robert Z. Leonard
Screenplay: Aldous Huxley


Greer Garson and Lawerence Oliver in the title roles, Mary Boland/Mrs. Bennet, Edna May Oliver/Lady de Bourgh, Maureen O’Sullivan/Jane, Edmund Gwenn/Mr. Bennet, Bruce Lester/Mr. Bingley, Edward Ashley/Wickham, Melville Cooper/Mr. Collins
​


The costumes are a bit too Victorian froo-froo, but this cast strikes the perfect balance in pitch and tone.


Mr. Darcy: "I have made the mistake of being honest with you."
Elizabeth Bennet: "Honesty is a greatly overrated virtue. Silence in this case would have been more agreeable."



Pride and Prejudice 1995

Director: Simon Langton
Screenplay: Andrew Davies



Colin Firth captures the prize for the “best” essence of the Darcy character, as does Adrian Lukis for his Wickham. This mini-series gave the plot a chance for a more genteel pacing.


Colin Firth/Mr. Darcy, Jennifer Ehle/Elizabeth, Susannah Harker/Jane, Alison Steadman/Mrs. Bennet, Benjamin Whitrow/Mr. Bennet, Crispin Bonham-Carter/Mr. Bingley, Adrian Lukis/Wickham, David Bamber/Mr. Collins, Barbara Leigh-Hunt/Lady de Bourgh


Mr. Bingley: "All young ladies are accomplished. They sing, they draw, they dance, speak French and German, cover screens and I know not what."
Mr. Darcy: "But not half a dozen would satisfy my notion of an accomplished woman."
Miss Bingley: "Oh, certainly. No woman can be really esteemed accomplished who does not also possess a certain something in her air, in her manner of walking, in the tone of her voice, her address and expressions."
Mr. Darcy: "And to all this she must yet add something more substantial in the improvement of her mind by extensive reading."
Elizabeth Bennet: "I'm no longer surprised at you knowing only six accomplished women, Mr Darcy. I rather wonder at your knowing any."



Pride and Prejudice 2005

Director: Joe Wright
Screenplay: Deborah Moggach 


Keira Knightley/Elizabeth, Matthew Macfadyen/Mr. Darcy, Rosamund Pike/Jane, Donald Sutherland/Mr. Bennet, Brenda Blethyn/Mrs. Bennet, Simon Woods/Bingley, Judy Dench/Lady de Bourgh, Rupert Friend/Wickham, Tom Hollander/Mr. Collins
​


Absolutely delightful, this version captures the setting and costumes perfectly, although the lighting was not always kind to Dame Judy Dench.


Mr. Darcy: "So this is your opinion of me. Thank you for explaining so fully. Perhaps these offences might have be overlooked had not your pride been hurt by my honesty..."

Elizabeth Bennet: "My pride?"

Mr. Darcy: "...in admitting scruples about our relationship. Could you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your circumstances?"

Elizabeth Bennet: "And those are the words of a gentleman. From the first moment I met you, your arrogance and conceit, your selfish disdain for the feelings of others made me realize that you were the last man in the world I could ever be prevailed upon to marry." [they look at each other for a long time as though about to kiss]


Mr. Darcy: "Forgive me, madam, for taking up so much of your time."



Bride and Prejudice 2005

Director: Gurinder Chadha
Screenplay: Paul Mayeda Berges


Aishwarya Rai/Latia, Martin Henderson/Mr. Darcy, Naveen Andrews/Balraj, Daniel Gillies/Wickham


Aishwarya Rai absolutely shines as the defiant Elizabeth Bennet in this Bollywood approach to Austin’s story. The brightly saturated colors and musical numbers serve to transition from one main scene to the next, and Nitin Ganatra as Mr. Kholi brings another dimension to the Mr. Collins character that the Western perspectives lack.

The only flaw is the direction of Martin Henderson, who plays the Darcy role too soft and sweet to provide any real romantic tension.

​

Lalita Bakshi: "I though we got rid of imperialists like you!"
Will Darcy: "I'm not British, I'm American."
Lalita Bakshi: "Exactly!"


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The Shop Around the Corner 1940

Starring Margaret Sullivan, James Stewart, Frank Morgan, Joseph Schildkraut, Sara Haden, Felix Bressart, William Tracy

Director: Ernst Lubitsch
Screenplay: Samson Raphaelson


Probably the sweetest romance film of the century, Shop Around the Corner has it all – love, secrets, melodrama, and lots of comedy.


Alfred Kralik: "There might be a lot we don't know about each other. You know, people seldom go to the trouble of scratching the surface of things to find the inner truth."

Klara Novak (Miss Novak): "Well I really wouldn't care to scratch your surface, Mr. Kralik, because I know exactly what I'd find. Instead of a heart, a hand-bag. Instead of a soul, a suitcase. And instead of an intellect, a cigarette lighter... which doesn't work."



You’ve Got Mail 1998

Starring Meg Ryan, Tom Hanks, Greg Kinnear, Dave Chappelle, Dabney Coleman, Parker Posey, Jean Stapleton, Heather Burns, Steve Zahn

Director: Nora Ephron
Screenplay: Nora Ephron



A smart and sassy twist on the original, Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks sail through Nora Ephron’s timeless battle of the sexes, New York style.


Joe Fox: "I think you'd discover a lot of things if you really knew me."
Kathleen Kelly: "If I really knew you, I know exactly what I'd find: instead of a brain a cash register, instead of a heart a bottom line." [gasps]

Joe Fox: "What?"
Kathleen Kelly: "I just had a breakthrough."
Joe Fox: "What is it?"

Kathleen Kelly: "I have you to thank for it. For the first time in my life, when confronted with a horrible, insensitive person, I knew exactly what I wanted to say and I said it."
​

Joe Fox: "I think you have the gift for it. It was a perfect blend of poetry and meanness."


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Sleuth 1972

Starring Michael Caine/Milo, Sir Lawrence Oliver/Andrew

Director: Joseph L. Mankiewicz
Screenplay: Anthony Shaffer


Caine and Oliver star in this iconic thriller, which was quite a stunning cinematic forte in the 70s.


Andrew Wyke: "It's a good thing, I am pretty much of an Olympic sexual athlete."
Milo Tindle: "Yes, I suppose these days you are concentrating more on the sprints than on the long distance stuff."

Andrew Wyke: "Not so dear boy! I am in the peak of condition. I could copulate for England at any distance."
Milo Tindle: "Well, as they say in the Olympics, it's not the winning, it's the taking part that counts."



Sleuth 2007

Starring Michael Caine/Andrew, Jude Law/Milo

Director: Kenneth Branagh
Screenplay: Harold Pinter



By 2007, Michael Caine was knighted by the Queen and had the distinction of playing in both cinematic versions of the Tony award-winning play. This version still retains its sly edginess, and director Kenneth Branagh adds a dash of cheeky noir-ish spirit to delight contemporary audiences.

​

Andrew Wyke: "Why have I never heard of you?"
Milo Tindle: "You will before long."
Andrew Wyke: "Really?"
Milo Tindle: "In spades."
Andrew Wyke: "That sounds threatening."
Milo Tindle: Does it?"
Andrew Wyke: Doesn't it?"

NOTE:  All quotations from IMDb.

Paulette Reynolds: 
​
@PG13Reynolds
@CinesMovieBlog

​p.reynolds@live.com


COPYRIGHT 2012/2017. Paulette Reynolds.  All CineMata Movie Madness blog articles, reviews, faux interviews, commentary, and the Cine Mata character are under the sole ownership of Paulette Reynolds.  All intellectual and creative rights reserved.  

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